Categories
Opinion/Commentary

ABC calls out abuse against Patricia Karvelas

Trigger warning: this post discusses cyber – bullying. If this is triggering for you, please take care. Feel free to skip this post.

Earlier this month, ABC’s News Director, Justin Stevens condemned trolls for abusing Radio National’s Patricia Karvelas. The abuse Karvelas experienced was largely sexualised, racist and homophobic.

It is disturbing, saddening and angering that Patricia should find herself the target of online trolling and abuse, much of it sexualised, homophobic and racist…

Effects of cyber – bullying

I can’t say I’m a massive Karvelas fan. Honestly, I don’t listen to Radio National. However, I’m vehemently against bullying, including cyber – bullying.

Everyone should know the potentially devastating effects of online bullying. These can include:

  • Guilt and feeling like the abuse is your fault
  • Hopelessness
  • Sadness and anxiousness
  • Feeling unsafe and
  • Shame, humiliation and embarrassment

What makes cyber- bullying worse than other forms of bullying is that it can be pervasive. It follows the victim home, any time day or night.

Homophobia

Image: Wirestock, iStock

I can’t believe homophobia is still an issue in Australia.

Karvelas has been a journalist since 2003. She started as a cadet reporter in Canberra.

Until recently, Karvelas was in the closet about her sexual orientation and the gender of her partner. She was particularly wary of anti – LGBTQ+ politicians. I don’t blame her for not wanting to be open about her sexuality back then.

Twenty years later, we’ve progressed. Same – sex marriage has been legal in Australia since 2017. Attempts to water down anti – discrimination protections have (so far) been shot down.

Yet, homophobia is obviously still an issue.

In my opinion, bullying based on sexual orientation is one of the worst forms of emotional bullying.

It’s an attack on a person’s core. The threat of being discriminated against or attacked based on sexual orientation just leaves people closeted. The ability to trust disappears and it can take a long time to get it back.

Karvelas has already battled that fear. She shouldn’t have to keep fighting it in 2023.

Racism

Image: Shutter2U, iStock

Karvelas has also allegedly faced racist abuse. For those who don’t know, Karvelas is of Greek descent.

Surely, we all know how terrible and how wrong racism is. Haven’t people learned from the aftermath of the Adam Goodes’ saga in 2015? I know people have different views on Goodes. However, I think clear that racist bullying played a part in ending his AFL career. AFL’s Executive Officer, Gillon McLachlan expressed regret on the AFL’s inaction against the abuse.

In the years since, racism has been in Australia’s consciousness. When AFL spectators abused former Adelaide Crows star, Eddie Betts in 2020, it was condemned immediately. That’s how it should be.

I can’t say it enough. No one deserves to be bullied. Everyone deserves to be safe at home, work and online.

If this post has brought up any issues for you and you’re in Australia, you can contact:

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Beyond Blue: 1300 224 636

If you are in immediate danger, call 000 (or your national emergency number).

Categories
Gender/ sexuality

Pressures on women, anti – trans rhetoric and LGBTQ+ bigotry are linked. Here’s how

Group of women from various cultural backgrounds smiling and laughing together
Image: SouthWorks, iStock

Last year, people were asking one question — what is a woman? Daily Wire’s, Matt Walsh made a documentary asking people that very question.

I haven’t watched What Is A Woman? I’ve only seen a great critique from YouTuber, Jessie Gender.

Through parody, Jessie Gender explored gender norms and steretypes. She also explored the role of patriarchy.

Jessie Gender parodying Matt Walsh
Through parodying commentator, Matt Walsh, Jessie Gender explored gender, gender stereotypes and oppression

She criticised Walsh’s interview style, including using leading questions and using the Maasai tribe to enforce traditional gender roles. What Walsh failed to admit was that life for Maasai women is oppressive.

Most Maasai women aren’t educated. According to Maasai Girl Education, only 48% of girls are enrolled in primary education. Only 10% enrol in secondary education.

Even more shocking, when a girl hits puberty (11 to 13), Maasai girls are subjected to female genital mutilation (FGM).

The Maasai tribe sees gender as more black and white than the West. Women are also treated as second class citizens. So ot beats me why Walsh used them to reinforce his arguments.

Dictionary expands definition of ‘woman’

Different dictionaries have different definitions for ‘woman’.

Merriam – Webster defines ‘woman’ as:

a. An adult female person

b. a woman belonging to a particularly category (as by birth, residence, membership or occupation) — usually used in combination

Cambridge Dictionary has a more expansive definition:

an adult who lives and identifies as female though they may have been said to have a different sex at birth.

Don’t use motherhood as a means to exclude

One contention about the definition of woman is motherhood. ‘Women have the ability to bear children!’, conservatives boom.

People are going to be annoyed by these cliches, but:

  • What about cis women that are infertile?
  • What about women that will never get into a stable (straight) relationship to have a child naturally?
  • What about women who have fertility issues because they’re intersex?
  • What about aromantic asexual woman who never enters a straight relationship?
  • Is it still OK for lesbian/ homoromantic and other women who love women (wlw) to seek IVF to have a baby?

I think the sudden obsession about motherhood is deliberately heteronormative. Something some women will never be.

I think that’s by design…

This is an attack on LGBTQ+ people as a whole

Trigger warning: this part of the post deals with gun voilence and homophobia. Please proceed with caution or stop reading this post altogeter.

Basing gender debate on stereotypes is an attack on LGBTQ+ people. It’s no coincidence that the gender debate has coincided with fearmongering over drag queens.

It’s also no coincidence that same – sex marriage was temporarily on shaky ground in the U.S. And, while conservatives can’t be blamed, five people were gunned down at Club Q in Colorado Springs, Colorado last November.

Yes, yes, the shooter who I won’t name) is non – binary. They also have a very homophobic father.

Like the aftermath of Pulse Nightclub massacre in 2016, pastors praised the murders at Club Q.

LGBTQ+ people, especially in the US, are in dangerous and uncertain territory. This is why I don’t understand how LGBTQ+ people who agree with people who are transphobic. Be careful!

I believe that there is a backlash against the LGBTQ+ community. Let’s hope it doesn’t result in LGBTQ+ rights being erased.

What do you think? What’s your view on Matt Walsh’s documentary? What about the state of LGBTQ+ rights in the West? Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments.

Categories
Opinion/Commentary

Early childhood educators call police on parent over LGBTQ+ curriculum complaint

Pencil and blocks on desk in childcare centre
Image: iStock

An early childhood centre has clashed with a parent over teaching LGBTQ+ topics.

According to Daily Telegraph, an anonymous parent claimed a staff member at Roseville Kids Care, Sydney, contacted police after the parent complained about ‘gender ideology’ being taught at the centre.

The issue the parent allegedly had was children as young as five learning ‘radical gender theory’. Children were learning about terms such as: non – binary, pansexual, lesbian and asexual. Children also coloured in Pride flags.

The parent said:

I visited it and was shocked that there was a giant out-size ‘pride’ flag. It was the biggest flag in the room, far bigger than the Australian flag. When I went in there was an entire wall describing different sexualities giving definitions of things like ‘pansexual’ and ‘lesbian’.

A number of photos taken by other parents show pride flags that were coloured by the children.

Should educators teach children about LGBTQ+ topics?

The actions from Roseville Kids Care has received support and criticism

Sydney psychologist, Clare Rowe said that LGBTQ+ concepts were too adult for young children to grasp.

…they simply do not have the mental faculties to process layered, complex information.

Rowe put the onus of teaching about gender and sexuality on the parents.

Director of Foundations of Western Civilisation Program for Institute of Public Affairs, Dr. Bella d’Abrera has condemned the centre.

Parents should be extremely concerned that they are entrusting their very young children to an after care centre which is indoctrinating them with radical gender theory.

However, Roseville Kids Care does have some supporters. CEO of the Network of Community Activities, Pauline Kane argued:

It’s about raising children with inclusive attitudes.

Kane claimed primary – aged children often raised questions about topics such as transgenderism. Those questions should be answered.

Is five too young to learn about LGBTQ+ topics?

I can see both sides. Yes, young children need to be protected from adult concepts they can’t grasp. Ideally, parents and caregivers should be able to approach topics like gender and sexuality in a way that’s age appropriate.

I don’t agree with young children getting involved in Pride culture. I didn’t like what some children have allegedly been exposed to in Pride parades this year.

While I don’t totally disagree with it, I don’t see why young children have to know what the Pride flags are. I’m happy with five- year – olds to know that; sometimes two women love each other like mummy and daddy do. Same with men, etc.

Likewise, when a child is being raised by same – sex or gender non – conforming parents, then bring it up. Children should be able to know that families are different.

Children should be able to explore their identity, including gender. Before anyone hits the roof, many children have a concept of their gender from a very young age.

So I’m in the middle. Little children don’t need to be exposed to Pride culture. However, it’s not a bad thing to teach children that it’s OK to express their gender the way they see fit. And some men love men and some women love women. Pride? That can wait until they’re older.

What do you think? Should young children learn about Pride and LGBTQ identities? Let me know your thoughts below.

Categories
Gender/ sexuality

The fear – mongerimg about trans and non – binary people has no basis

Image: iStock

The Trans Day of Visibility was on the 31 March. The day aims to acknowledge the achievements of trans and non – binary people. It also highlights the discrimination trans and non – binary people still face.

Transgender and gender diverse people are the hot topic of the day. Unfortunately, ‘issues’ like Lia Thompson winning in swimming take up a lot of time on social media, media and for policy makers.

So does children transitioning. This is despite Melbourne’s Royal Children’s Hospital stating that gender affirming treatment is done in two stages.

Stage one takes part under the age of sixteen. This includes social transitioning, affirmation and, yes, puberty blockers. These parts of transition are usually reversible.

Stage two of gender affirming treatment only takes place when is a child is sixteen or older. This stage includes hormone treatments and surgery. At this stage, treatment is largely irreversible.

No one is ‘turned’ trans

Commissioner for LGBTQ communities, Todd Fernando, emphatically denies that anyone is ‘turned trans’ due to affirmation of trans and gender diverse identities.

He wrote in The Age that the existence and bodily autonomy is “not up for debate”.

Gender affirmation can save lives

Let’s cut to the chase. Affirming trans people’s identities can save lives. Fernando linked a number of studies that suggested that gender affirmation, including puberty blockers are life saving to many trans and gender diverse youth.

Young trans and gender diverse people who undergo gender affirming hormone therapy and puberty blockers are less likely to experience depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts.

Psychology magazine, Psychology Today reinforced this belief. After reviewing sixteen studies Jack Tarbi MD concluded:

…the body of research indicates that these interventions result in favourable mental health outcomes.

Jack Tarbin MD MHS, Psychology Today, January 24 2022

In contrast, non – affirming actions can end in disaster. This is why there has been such a strong push to ban so – called ‘conversion therapy’, including against trans and gender – diverse people in Australia.

Fear mongering about trans and gender non – binary people is (recent) history repeating itself

LGBT rainbow Pride flag
Image: iStock

I’m not trying to be disrespectful. And I’m not trying to play the No True Scotsman card.

However, I’m sceptical of the stances of some LGBTQ+ people. It’s strange to me, for example, that a transwoman would want to ‘debate’ people like Ben Shapiro or Steven Crowder on whether they should be referred by their preferred pronouns.

I mean YouTuber and transwoman Blaire White debated what people should refer to her as ‘she’.

Remember the fear – mongering over Safe Schools teaching young children about sex – toys? How gays and lesbians were accused of ‘indoctrinating’ children? And don’t get me started on the slippery – slope arguments against same – sex marriage.

My point is, the fear – mongering over trans and gender non – binary people is history repeating itself. Children are being used as pawns (again) and it seems most arguments are just misinformation. Again.

I think the evidence is clear. Falsely demonising trans and gender non – binary people does harm. If we really care about children, we have to accept them for who they are. Including if their trans or non – binary.

Categories
Opinion/Commentary

The ‘Religious Discrimination Bill was always an attack on the LGBTQ+ community

Image iStock

The Religious Freedom Bill has been suspended indefinitely. Let’s hope it never sees the light of day.

This has been a big blow to Scott Morrison. It has disappointed conservatives and torn the Liberal National Party (LNP) apart.

The Religious Discrimination Bill has collapsed because it’s true intent has been exposed.

The ‘Folau clause’

This was the first victim of the Religious Discrimination Bill’s collapse.

Israel Folau was a Rugby Union champion who was sacked in 2019 after he repeatedly defied Rugby AustralIa by posting anti – LGBTQ posts on social media.

The last offending post was a paraphrase of modern translations of 1 Corinthians 6:9.

Folau threatened to sue Rugby Australia for religious discrimination. The case was settled outside court and Rugby Australia paid an undisclosed settlement to Folau.

The ‘Folau clause’ would have prevented employees being sacked under similar circumstances.

Citipointe Christian College contract controversy

Image: iStock

About a month ago, Citipointe Christian College in Brisbane came under fire after their enrolment contract that was leaked.

The contract denied the identities of trans and non – binary people. They also listed homosexuality as a sin among bestiality and paedophilia.

This caused fear for LGBTQ+ students. School principal, Brian Melhuran denied that students have been expelled for being LGBTQ+.

A former Citipointe Christian College student also alleged that students were shown a video of a person being beheaded in class as a deterrent to being LGBTQ+. Staff allegedly told students that’s what will happen in Hell.

The backlash against the school has been fierce. A change.org petition calling for a revocation of the contract gained over 150,000 signatures. In contrast, an Australian Christian Lobby petition defending the school has around 41,000 signatures.

As a result, Mulheran finally buckled and the contract was withdrawn.

Citipointe Christian students and Mulheran reported being harassed and receiving sdeath threats. This is NOT OK and shame on those who participate in that behaviour.

Citipointe fiasco causes panic and backflips

Scott Morrison has vowed to close existing loopholes in the Sex Discrimination Acts in numerous States. Currently, religious schools and institutions are exempt from discrimination laws against LGBTQ+ people.

Scott Morrison vowed to protect lesbian and gay students from expulsion from schools.

However, trans, non – binary people and their advocates were left disappointed. Trans and non – binary students were not granted the same protection.

Religious Discrimination Bill was always an anti – LGBTQ Bill

If something positive came out of Citipointe Christian College fiasco, it’s that the cat is out of the bag.

If the Religious Discrimination Bill, people like Brian Mulheran would have been emboldened.

Luckily, enough people saw through the spin. People were willing to stand up against bigotry. And as a part of the LGBTQ+ community, I myself, I want to thank all those who stood up and protected vulnerable people.

Let’s never allow legislation that gives bigotry a foothold. We need to keep up the fight.

Do you agree disagree? Was the Religious Discrimination Act just an excuse to discriminate? Let me know your thoughts in the comments. below.

Categories
Opinion/Commentary

Christian school backtracks on contract and PM vows change to Religious Freedom bill. A win for the LGBTQ+ community?

Image: iStock

Did Australia see ‘religious freedom’ in action?

Brisbane’s Citipointe Christian College came under fire when they demanded parents of would – be students sign a contract that called homosexual and bisexual ‘acts’ a sin. They also refused to acknowledge the gender identity of a student who was trans or non – binary.

The contract listed homosexuality and bisexuality as ‘sins’, along with bestiality, fornication and incest. Unlike what other reports I’ve seen, no, the contract didn’t liken bestiality, etc with homosexuality and bisexuality.

The backlash

The condemnation was swift and fierce. A petition calling to recall the contract gained over 150,000 signatures. This is in contrast with an Australian Christian Lobby petition defending the school, which got around 30,000 signatures.

Pastor and Principal, Brian Mulheran dug his heels in, but denied that LGBTQ+ students get expelled for their orientation or gender identity:

While I have been principal at the college, we have not expelled or refused to enrol any student on the basis that they are gay or transgender.

Former students spoke out against the school. One student even alleged a disturbing incident when students saw a video of authorities beheading LGBTQ+ people to act as a deterrent. 

Last Friday, advocates organised a protest at King George Square in Brisbane.

Parents refused to sign contract

Parents told the ABC in an article that they refused to sign the contract. They condemned the college of discriminating against students on the basis of religion, as well as gender and sexuality. 

They argued that the contract violated Christian values. That depends on how you define ‘Christian values”. Do you define “Christian values” based on the Golden Rule? Or a modern loose interpretation on a handful of passages in the Bible? Pastor Mulheran apparently defines it by the latter.

The problem with ‘just go to another school’

Prime Minister Scott Morrison has condemned discrimination against LGBTQ+ students. He even vowed that the pending Religious Discrimination Bill will actually protect LGBTQ+ students.

He has also promised that he’ll try and reverse anti – discrimination exemptions that are in place in a number of Australian States and Territories. 

These ‘promises’ have faced opposition among the Liberal/ National Party members.

One common argument against protections is that parents should ‘just look for another school’.

There are a few problems with this. Citipointe Christian College is K – 12. Children may not realise their LGBTQ+ by the time they are four or five. 

Some don’t know exactly what their sexuality or gender identity is until years later. So, if a student, who has been at Citipointe Christian College from Kindergarten, realise they may be gay at sixteen, what, should they just leave? It doesn’t make sense. Put the onus on schools, not parents or students.

 

Schools need to be inclusive

I’ve written before about my struggle with my sexuality when I was at school. It was hard to admit I was struggling with my sexuality in school. And I was offered nothing but support.

I’d hate to think how it would’ve been if the school wasn’t supportive. This is why I strongly believe that all schools should be welcoming and accepting of all students. They need to be a safe place for students, especially if they are not supported by parents or caregivers. Discrimination against students can’t be tolerated.

Latest updates

Pastor Mulheran released an ‘apology’ of sorts. There have been calls for him to resign. He is currently taking leave. It’s not known when/ if he’ll return. 

In Parliament, the Religious Discrimination Act and discrimination act exemptions are being debated.

My take? Scrap the exemptions and forget the Religious Discrimination Act. Discrimination against LGBTQ+ people was always the aim of the Religious Discrimination Act.

What do you think of Citipointe Christian College or the Religious Discrimination Act debate? Feel free to put your thoughts (respectfully) in the comments below.

Categories
Opinion/Commentary

A – League player condemns homophobic abuse

Image: iStock

A – League player, Josh Cavallo publicly spoke out about homophobia he experienced while playing against Melbourne Victory last weekend. Spectators abused him while he was on the field and on Instagram.

He described the events as “disappointing”.

He also attacked Instagram for not doing enough to combat abuse.

To @instagram, I don’t want any child or adult to have to receive the hateful and hurtful messages I’ve received.

He went on:

I knew truly being who I am that I was going to come across this. It’s a sad reality that your platforms are not doing enough to stop these messages.

Football community offer support to Cavallo 

Luckily, Cavallo has received a lot of support within the sporting community.

When addressing the bullying, Australian Professional Leagues (APL) chief executive, Danny Townsend promised that the league would “issue sanctions to any people found to be involved”. 

Additionally, Melbourne Victory also vowed to work with Adelaide United and others to stamp out abuse. 

Lastly, PFA co – chief executives Beau Busch and Kathryn Gill condemned the abuse as “abhorrent” and “illustrated their [the bullies’] cowardice”.

Professional Football’s mixed history with the LGBTQ+ community

Australian football codes has a mixed history with LGBTQ+2 rights.

NRL player Ian Roberts was the first player to come out as gay in 1995. Unfortunately, he became a victim of a violent homophobic hate crime. 

In 2010 former Western Bulldogs champion, Jason Akermanis said that footballers shouldn’t come out as gay. He said he didn’t want gay footballers hitting on other men in the change rooms. He denied that he was homophobic.

Even if Akermanis didn’t intend to be homophobic, I think most people can agree that his comments were ignorant. It isn’t as if lesbian, gay, bi and homoromantic people hit on all members of the same – sex that they see. But I digress…

In 2015, the AFL premiered Pride Round. This was to commemorate the coming out of former footballer, Jason Ball back in 2012. The Sydney Swans and St. Kilda Saints battle each other in the Pride Round each year. 

The National Rugby League (NRL) have also publicly supported the LGBTQ+ community. 

On NRL’s website, they have a page openly supporting the LGBTQ+ community. The league claims that they are:

…proud to participate in Pride In Sport (PIS) Index; a recenlty established benchmarking instrument designed to measure and advise on the creation of inclusive and equitable environments for LGBTI players…

Is football still victim of macho culture?

Professional sport, especially football, has come a long way in LGBTQ+ inclusion. But old habits die hard. 

Even though same – sex marriage was legalised in Australia in 2017, it seems some people still have potentially outdated views about football, gender and sexuality. 

The football codes still have to be wary of largely outdated views on masculinity. Yes, gay, bi and pansexual men are ‘macho’ enough to play football, regardless of code. 

Also, why is someone’s sexuality a determinant on whether or not someone can play sport? Isn’t that what critics are always saying? To keep sexuality out of the public/ work, etc?

Yet, it’s critics that complain and harass LGBTQ+ public figures. It’s the trolls and bullies that keep shining a spotlight on a person’s personal life. Leave LGBTQ+ alone! It’s that simple!

YOU keep out of other people’s bedroom. YOU stop gawking when a same – sex couple hold hands or *gasp* kiss. And mind your own business. 

If you are LGBTQ+ and are struggling mentally, you can contact QLIfe on 1800 184 527 or their web chat

 

 

 

 

Categories
Gender/ sexuality

Bisexual people still stigmatised when it comes to dating

Bisexual pride flag (from top): pink, purple and blue
Image: iStock

I know it’s nearly over, but I thought I would do this post in part because it’s Pride Month.

Writer and social worker, Deidre Fidge posted and article on ABC Everyday lamenting the stigma bisexual people still face.

According to the Australia Talks survey, 44% of nearly 60,000 respondents claimed they weren’t open to dating someone who’s bisexual. A further 15% claimed they were reluctant.

While you can’t control who you are (or aren’t) attracted to, this figure is quite alarming. And it does raise questions:

  • Do people automatically assume that people attracted to more than one gender will cheat?
  • Is there still stigma surrounding sexual history?
  • What sexual history do people assume bi/ poly/ pan people have?

Why LGBTQ+ people should stand by bisexual people

I believe that much of biphobia boils down to one pet peeve of mine: they’re reduced to what they ‘do’.

These stereotypes take away the humanity of LGBTQ+ people.

Sexual stereotypes that fuelled opposition to same – sex marriage for years.

That caused commentators to fear – monger about same – sex marriage leading to polygamy.

People assumed that same – sex couples can’t raise healthy children despite numerous studies saying otherwise. 

For years, asexual people have been told they’re broken or that asexuality doesn’t exist.

Transgender and non – binary people have become the new target. Basic reason? Because of people’s obsession of othering minorities and reducing them to what’s between their legs.

What’s disappointing is seeing and hearing other LGBTQ+ people go on the attack. Often, LGBTQ+ content creators and media personalities willingly throw other LGBTQ+ under the bus. Can we just make it stop?

Other issues bisexual people face

Statistically, bisexual people make up the biggest percentage of people that are LGBTQ+.

Bisexual people can experience hostility from both gay and straight people. Often, their orientation is not taken seriously. They are often pressured to ‘pick a side’. Bi women are assumed to be straight, but ‘experimenting’. Meanwhile, bi men are considered gay.

As a result of erasure and discrimination, bisexual people often experience loneliness, depression and suicidality.

Despite increase in gay and lesbian acceptance in the West, the same can’t be said for bisexual people. According to a study by Associate Professor, Brian Dodge. He told Washington Post that attitudes towards bisexuals have only improved slightly since the 1990’s.

But, won’t bisexual partners cheat?

People, regardless of gender identity or orientation can cheat.

There are a number of resons why a person may chest n a spouse or partner. They include: unmet needs, low self – esteem and the need for revenge.

Opportunity can be a risk factor. However, other factors listed above are usually at play.

So, can we put the idea that just because someone is bisexual or pansexual that they’re more likely to cheat to rest?

If you’re in Australia and this post has raised any issues, you can contact:

Lifeline: 13 11 14

Beyond Blue: 1300 224 636, or chat online.

QLife: 1800 184 527. They also have a webchat.

If you feel like you need emergency help, call 000.

As always, feel free to add support services or emergency contacts in the comments if you’re outside Australia.

Categories
Gender/ sexuality

Mental health and the need for asexuality inclusion in schools

Image: iStock

Trigger warning: This post deals with suicide and may be triggering for some readers.

In September last year, the worst nightmare for any parent came true. 13 – year – old, Lily Dowling had taken her own life.

Before her death, she wrote letters to her best friends and left them in thier lockers. 

Jane Hansen from Herald Sun described her as a “gorgeous 13 – year  – old with a love for Harry Potter books and the world at her feet…”

When speaking about her daughter, Emma Heeley said:

She was the kindest, most caring girl who was always looking out for others. She attracted really beautiful people and had a lot of friends. 

The warning signs

There were clues that Lily wasn’t coping. Lily had written a poem about her own death nine months before the tragedy. She’d posted it on Instagram. Unfortunately, Ms. Heeley only found the poem after Lily’s death. 

By August 2019, Lily had started to withdraw.

“I knew something was really, really wrong, but she would just close up and not talk to me”, Ms. Heeley said. 

Lily refused to go to therapy.

Lily’s death is only one of a string of suicides among young girls that have gotten worse over the last ten years.

Lily came out as asexual

Three months before her death, Lily came out on Instagram as asexual. (Kudos for Jane Hansen for properly defining it in the article). 

Professor Ian Hickie raised concern about young people feeling the need to put a label on themselves in such a sexualised culture.

It’s true that young people shouldn’t be forced to place a label on themselves before their ready. Sexuality can be complex, especially while growing up.

Having said that, young people, should be able to come out if they feel sure about how they feel. 

How many cases like this out there?

How many young asexual people feel lost, depressed and even suicidal? Studies suggest that young LGBT people are at least 2.5 times more likely to take their own lives than heterosexual peers. However, this data excludes asexual and non binary trans people. 

In a paper, Morag Yule, Lori Brotto and Boris Bolzaka guessed that asexual individuals may suffer worse mental health issues due to stigma than other groups.

It wouldn’t surprise me if this was the case. What I found the hardest growing up was the erasure. I was told that asexuality Leither didn’t exist or it was something that people grew out of. 

I’ve said before that I don’t blame the people that told me these myths. This was in the early 2000’s – from 2005 to 2007. But I do hope things are changing.

School counsellors and other mental health workers need to know about asexuality

Everyone should feel free to go to a counsellor. LGBTQ+ people need to have counsellors that are going to accept and validate their identities and experiences. They need to know they won’t be judged.

This is why acceptance of asexual people is so important. School counsellors, social workers and other mental health workers need to know that asexuality is real. 

 

Maybe this can be included in a professional development program. Or make it a part of social work and psychology degree subjects/ modules. You might be scoffing at this, but the time for erasure and ignorance needs to end. 

 

 

If you feel like you need assistance, you can call Lifeline: 13 11 14.

BeyondBlue: 1300 224 636 (you can also chat online. They also have LGBTQ+ resources. They include asexuality).

If you believe that you or someone you know is in crisis, contact 000 or your country’s emergency number. 

Please leave your thoughts or helpful mental health hotlines in your area in the comments below. 

 

 

Categories
Film, TV

Australian TV needs to stop using diversity as a gimmick

TV shot of Brooke Blurton, Australia's 2021 Bachelorette

Australian TV will soon make “history”.

This year, The Bachelorette will feature Brooke Blurton. She is the show’s first Indigenous and openly bisexual (successful) star. Both men and women will be competing for her affection. People have expressed scepticism on social media. Many claim it’s a gimmick.I can’t say I blame them.

Producers refused request for an LGBTQ+ Bachelor

Producers of The Bachelor/ The Bachlorette Australia ruled out having an LGBTQ bachelor or bachelorette. This was less than three years ago, after Australia had legalised same – sex marriage. Host, Osher Gunsberg was all for the move. Their excuse was that it didn’t fit the “concept”.

The ‘concept’ apparently needed heterosexuality and monogamy. This excuse raised another issue; the idea that LGBTQ+ people couldn’t have relationships to cis – het people.

This excuse was made less than two years ago.

So, why now? Have ratings plummeted over the years? Is that why they’re using LGBTQ +  and Indigenous people?

I’m sick of this. LGBTQ+, Indigenous people, and people of colour in general, shouldn’t be just add ons. They shouldn’t be used to make a company, or a TV production feel better about themselves. And, frankly, that’s how the TV industry in Australia has been acting recently.

We should be past the idea of having people of colour or LGBTQ+ people in pop culture as revolutionary. Enough with the obsessions of the ‘firsts’..

Australian TV and its issues with diversity

Close up of black remote with white numbers on buttons
Image: iStock

The Bachelorette hasn’t been the only show to face issues with diversity.

Last month, former Neighbours actors Sharon Clanton, Meyne Wyatt and Sharon Johal claimed to be victims of racism, sexism and homophobia. They also accused the production company, Fremantle Media of not doing enough to prevent it. This shows that virtue signalling doesn’t work. Inclusion has to be genuine.

Will producers treat Blurton fairly?

I doubt I’ll watch the Bachelorette. If I do, it won’t be much of it. However, I do hope Brooke Blurton is treated and portrayed fairly.

I hope that the producers respect Blurton’s identities. I hope producers don’t erase Blurton’s bisexual or Indigenous identities. Let’s also hope they don’t make soft-core porn from Blurton’s sexuality, either.

Enough of ‘firsts’ and gimmicks

The Neighbours controversy (for me) proves that meeting a ‘quota’ is not enough. Having Indigenous or LGBTQ+ characters is not enough.

It’s time to normalise LGBTQ+ and Indigenous people in Australian pop culture. They should be included without causing a news story! Can we get to that point?

 

Just another side note, can we please not make Blurton’s identities into a debate? If Blurton claims she’s Aboriginal and bi, can we just leave it at that? So what if Blurton didn’t identify as bi three years ago? She can now if she thinks it fits her. Sometimes sexuality isn’t so clear cut. And her being or “identifying” as Aboriginal? I don’t want to get into that.

 

 

What do you think of The Bachelorette this year? Will you watch it? Feel free to leave your thoughts in the comments.